I am 75 percent satisfied with my scleral lenses

I finally got them today. They feel great on my diseased cornea but there is some slight lid sensation on the edges of my eyes because of the large size. However I would much rather have these than not.

A definitive date

After not having heard from the secretary at Ellsworth's office, who was supposed to call me and let me know when my scleral contacts were in, I called her today and said politely, "I don't mean to bug you but I just want to know when my sclerals will be in," and she said, "Well, let me check. Our manufacturer will have them in by Monday. So they should be available to you by Tuesday or Wednesday."

Waiting for scleral lenses to come in

I must have ordered them a week and a half ago and I am still waiting for them to come in. Apparently scleral lenses take much longer to come in than regular contacts because they're more specialized and harder to make. I can't wait until they get here.

It happened! Finally!

Dr. Ellsworth agreed to let me try scleral lenses. I had to do a sort of demonstration for him since he'd never really heard of them and I even had to show him an article that I printed out off the internet about them. And then he just kind of gave in and said, "I'll call the lab. See if they can get these things ordered." He never said a definite yes, that they could, indeed be ordered, just that he'd call and ask. So the next day I asked his secretary if the lab could do it. She said yes. Then she said, "I'll call you when they come in." They cost $250 for a year's supply. I can try them first but I can send them back if I don't like them. Hurray! I hope they work.

Horrible day

I am a collge senior and I hung out with a freshman...Well it wasn't so bad...We played frisbee on the lawn and watched TV. I went to one class which the professor didn't even bother to show up to and it's the first day. He was still in Beijing. Lazy bastard. An aid passed out the syllabus and that was it. Class over. I purchased the text and went home. All day I hated my glasses. All day I could feel them resting on my nose. When I played frisbee they got sweaty and slipped down my face. I meet old friends and they must think, "You used to be cool. What are you doing with a freshman?" But the poor girl is a nice little thing so... My mom says she will help me get LASIK in December. Only four months of hating my glasses left. You have no idea.

Blepharitis and depression

I must insist to my optometrist that he let me try scleral lenses. The man was reluctant to do it because he said he'd never fit a patient for those before. I could tell he was nervous, like he really didn't know how to do it and was nervous to try. But I'm telling you, I need to have them because the kind of contacts that rest on your cornea is just too painful for me. I also have eyelid problems (called blephairitis) and I wonder if even sclerals will help with that sort of thing. Well I hope so. I've been acting strangely lately-because of my pain and my friends and family have begun to notice. I want to much to rid myself of the depression and pain. I've become pretty antisocial since the development of my eye problems. And I've considered suicide...Which is pretty fucking scary. But I guess I won't do it because my family wants me to live and would miss me I'm sure.

So I want to die

I know I will never get a boyfriend with my thick glasses. Even if I did I wouldn't feel comfortable around him as I don't feel comfortable around anyone with glass and metal resting on my face. It seems whenever I laugh they jam into my face. And glasses are generally uncomfortable. And I want to get a laptop. I have been saving all summer at my manual labor min. wage job for one. It was either a laptop or a car and I figured the smartest thing to do would be to get a laptop for school since I am a student and all. But turns out I can't get a laptop since the one I can afford is too far away for me to drive to. And without a car? My life blows. I left my sleeping meds at my mom's house and didn't sleep a wink last night. I literally stayed up all night until 6 a.m and on...